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| Here @ YPL, we care about community. Without community and loyal fans, where would we be? Now it's time to give something back. So we have founded this loving organization to provide help for those too weak to help themselves. We call it Adopt~a~Junkie. We provide a home, love, spiritual and physical nourishment coupled with education to many unfortunate junkies who have been entrusted to us. We receive no government subsidy, but rely solely on the gifts of caring, generous people like you to be able to provide for the needs of the children and adults alike. You do want to help, don’t you? If you refuse to help us, you will go to hell, you know. |
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We are capable of sheltering the masses within huge habitation domes. This is truly the first dope community on the planet. Every time we visit the complex, we get more hugs in a day than anyone should be allowed to have! |
| The residents are all sweaty and shaky, some even barf on us. But we don’t mind. All hard work endures a bit o’ puke. Giving back to the community is our goal; it should be yours, too! After our daily rounds, the real fun starts! The dope peddler waltzes out with his little shiny dope cart, and all our junkies swarm round like happy jittery bumblebees, anxiously awaiting their fix. It is important that we point out clean needles are distributed in conjunction with our drug dispensary times. If you don't shoot clean, you're shooting mean! | |
| For only a grand a day, (that’s less than a fully loaded computer) YPL will help provide food, housing and education to enable a junkie to become a productive member of society. Sponsors who write or visit their adopted dope fiend provide a sense of belonging that cannot be measured with money. We can't guarantee a letter back, as the residents like to nod out on a regular basis. Knowing someone cares can make all the difference in the world to an addict. The smack don’t hurt either. In fact, being on the skag helps everybody out. It makes time flooooooow, smooth and fluid. |  |
| All our spazwit addicts are hoping and praying for loving friends and family, like every emotionally crippled child wants. Won't you become a part of their track mark-riddled life? As a sponsor, you can help provide a web of support for these chemically dependent people (not to mention a 20 bag a day). |
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| Contact YPL’s adoption agency in your own country for information about adopting small broken junkie kids. Visitors are always welcome at the facility, although an appointment is necessary. Financial gifts are accepted as well. Be sure to indicate your gift is for "Adopt~a~Junkie". Or, if you prefer, contact us via email at staff@iamlost.com. | |
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